Posted by: clearspaces60 | October 31, 2014

THE POPCORN TECHNIQUE

When you think about throwing away broken or stained items, giving away clothes or shoes that no longer fit or are not in style, does the fear rise and the panic set in?  Does the anxiety feel like imminent death?  Do you stop the process just before the feeling can be fully expressed and dealt with?  If so, you are a bag of unpopped kernels of popcorn.  Your fears and anxieties keep rising under all the clutter but have not risen enough to feel your true feelings and release the energy needed to make a change. Until the kernel is popped and all the energy is released, it remains unfinished and incomplete.

If you can see it from that perspective, that each item that is triggering the emotional response is in need of reaching the higher temperature of popping, then you can live through the burst of true emotion and energy. Perhaps this information can ease your pain to a small degree at first. With the realization that something fully formed is waiting on the other side of the expressed emotion, you will more easily embrace the fear, panic and anxiety.  You can begin to gather the courage needed to face the clutter and deal with it.

It may lead to what is truly being buried, to release what no longer serves you beyond the physical mess.  The clutter is masking something else, a difficult situation that needs to be faced, a relationship that needs to be redefined or creativity that needs to be expressed.  By taking any action, especially uncomfortable action, many may feel they are blowing up a situation or throwing a grenade into the mix.  Maybe the blowing up is required just like expanding and bursting the popcorn kernel.  No longer expending energy trying to contain heat and energy inside a constricted place- you are popping the corn kernel and transforming what is already there, what truly lies within the kernel.  Nothing is taken away-it only expands-similar to the caterpillar turning into a butterfly or a seed growing into a plant.  But we haven’t got time for that, this mess has already grown and immediate action needs to take place.

You can throw away trash, release clutter and let go of things that are taking up space.  There may be fear, doubt, anxiety, pain and negative voices in your heading saying things like-  “What if you need that someday?”  “You do need 5 ice cream scoops.”  “What if you get audited and they go back 20 years?”  “You are such a loser.”  Or the voices of others saying “You are the family keeper of all the stuff”  “How dare you give away Great-Grandpa’s ball of twine! That means you did not love him” “You are so ungrateful.”  Now you may have never met Great-Grandpa, but you surely inherited the family guilt!

If a real life person said those things to you, give them the ball of twine, ship it to them if necessary.  Oh, they have no room for it, well neither do you! This is where Courage, Confidence and Clarity must be created and cultivated. You CAN do it!  You are not weak, you are not a wimp, and you are not a welcome mat to be walked all over.  Notice I did not say doormat.  First of all, I was keeping with words that begin with a “W”, but secondly, when we say doormat what we really mean is that you have put out a welcome mat that says “Walk all over me, I won’t stand up to you and I won’t stand up for myself.” And the welcome mat is a big flashing neon light, so pull the plug and put out the “No Solicitors Allowed” sign.

Whether you are letting go of 50 year old twine, a garage full of stuff, a closet full of clothes, dusty old knick knacks, those last ten pounds, a significant other or spouse, releasing your adult children into the world, letting go of an unhealthy job or friendship, there is always a moment of fear, tension, pressure or uncertainty and then on the other side of that moment is a clear space, a car in the garage, room for new clothes, learning how to flirt again, an extra bedroom, healthy relationships,—Just like going from an inedible kernel of corn to a piece of edible delicious popcorn, which by the way is actually a healthy treat if it contains no GMOs.  So get popping!

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