Posted by: clearspaces60 | July 6, 2016

Are You READY to Receive?

I hear you, this blog is called Clear Spaces. Doesn’t that mean we are clearing shit stuff out? Decluttering, making room, giving what we don’t use, need, want or love the old heave-ho?  Yes, it means all of that.  AND it means making room for what we do want to receive.

We do not live in a stagnant universe and unless you want to be incredibly frugal or live off the grid, then we are going to have stuff continue to come into our lives.  The answer is twofold, First, are you open to receive what you want, need, desire and love?  I think quite a bit is focused on being open. So let’s talk about the Second aspect, are you READY to receive it?

We may think we are ready to receive more money, better health, a romantic relationship, new job and whatever else our heart desires yet we forget to clean up and make room both literally and figuratively.

I learned a lot from Edwene Gaines, an icon in manifesting and prosperity.  I had the great fortune to hear her speak a couple of times in my late 20’s.  Many of us in the audience wanted a significant other and a couple of things she said really stuck with me. First, she wanted you to have a clear and specific idea about your desired mate, second she asked what our house looked like, was the living room ready for company? Who wants to make out on a couch that is covered with newspapers and clothes with a messy coffee table? Well she was in her 50’s at that time so I guess the men in her life had higher standards.  Then she asked if our bedrooms were ready for a guest. Edwene!!  Perhaps this is why that image stuck with me.

Yet this can be applied to anything we are open to receiving.  Do you know where you will put the money when you receive it, are the deposit slips handy? If banking on-line, do you know your user name and password?  Do you have a plan in place so the money doesn’t slip through your fingers?  How about Health?  We think we are ready for better health, but have we looked at how our lives will change. Are we ready for more energy, more time, more opportunities to take because our illness, injury is gone?  Are we truly ready to weigh less?  Do we have at least a couple of outfits for this smaller, leaner frame? If you want to travel, do you have the proper ID to fly or a passport to leave the country?

Now here are a couple of hard ones for me, I want more books and more shoes.  Yes, I have three Kindles, my husband keeps trying to get me to use them and at times I do, but for the most part I love the actual book.  And as much I want a library, there is no room in the house.  Can I ask myself the tough questions, which books can I give away and how do I make more room on my bookshelves?  Hard but necessary.  And shoes, anyone have connections to Bandelino? My favorite brand, I can spot a pair a mile away.  At this time, I don’t necessarily have to release any shoes, because I have been pretty diligent about my closet for the past few years.  I may have to rearrange a few things and this is still part of getting Ready to receive those beautiful shoes.

Now with the physical work out of the way, what about the mental and emotional work.  Ready for a new partner or a new job? Are you? Are there any exes you need to let go of emotionally? Companies, bosses or co-workers to forgive so they don’t show up in different clothing this time around?  Release and forgive so repeat offenders stay far, far away.

Take a look at what you want to bring into your life.  Make sure there is Space Available in your head, heart and home.

 

Posted by: clearspaces60 | June 24, 2016

Shaken, Not Stirred

It’s Friday and 5 O’clock Somewhere

“I want pure clear alcohol”.  I met some friends at a bar after work one Friday. I needed a new drink, Rum and Coke wasn’t going to cut it. My day had been horrible. I had been advised/counseled/threatened that although I was dealing with a painful worker’s comp injury, I had better have a smile on my face, be more feminine-my 80’s pastel suits weren’t enough?? AND I had better compliment our female CEO on her clothing or jewelry to stay in her good graces.  Are you serious? Yes, said my boss, the male CFO.  Are your balls in her purse?  (Turns out they were, they had an affair that ended pretty badly for him, another story for another day.)

I was all of 29 at this point in my life, and the friends were older men of 33 or 34, well versed in pure clear alcohol. They ran through a list of choices, gin, vodka, whiskey, scotch, tequila.  Hmm, my best friend Jayne’s dad served us vodka tonics when we turned 18, heavy on the tonic but still good.  Vodka was chosen, then how did I want it, did I like olives, pearl onions, lemon, lime.  Olives sounded good, a little food with my drink.  The dry martini on the rocks was selected.  Why on the rocks?  I honestly don’t remember.  These were the kind of guys that looked out for me, maybe they thought the more ice the better. It was magnificent, I sipped away and felt like a real adult.  Well the boys were right, it has been my favorite cocktail ever since.

Last week we celebrated a friend’s birthday, two couples having dinner.  We ordered cocktails and the bartender must have been new or confused.  My vodka martini was cloudy, not clear, and tasted of cucumber or something close to it.  We all tasted it to see if it was “me” or the drink.  Looking at the opaque mixture, we all started talking about the different drinks we used to enjoy regularly and in greater volume.  Long Island Ice Tea, Rum and Coke, Sloe Gin, Harvey Wallbangers and on we went.  Looking at the drinks we were ordering now in our 50’s and 60’s, martinis, gimlets, alcohol of your choice on the rocks, it occurred to me that we had moved from sugary, sometimes messy combinations to something more clear and straight forward.  It was pretty obvious if your order was incorrect, yet there was still a little fun in making sure, and there was a clarity and simplification in our consumption.  Maybe we really are grown-ups.

P.S. Do not look up the history of the word “cocktail”, I am still trying to erase it from my brain.

 

Posted by: clearspaces60 | June 8, 2016

Creating Courage

I am sick and tired of needing courage and having to create it in order to face fear, disappointment and heartache.  Life is not fair and I am fed up with that saying as well.  Why can’t life be fair??  The people who say that are usually the people not suffering.  They pat the suffering on the head and say “Life’s not fair”.  In other words, I have mine, you don’t, get over it.  What does this have to do with courage?  I am not sure but every now and then a good rant clears the senses.  You can’t have courage unless you are afraid of something.  You can’t be brave unless there is something scary to overcome.  Who in the hell came up with this life strategy?

How about we all have a day off?

Just one day off, no need for courage or bravery, nothing to fear, no one is hurting or suffering or afraid.  No nightmares, real or not.  No one is harming anyone, no one is experiencing pain.  No drama, no stories, no poverty, no hunger, no sickness, no homelessness, no tragedies.  No crime, no pollution, no lack, no evictions, no overdrawn accounts, no car trouble, no traffic, no harsh words, no injustice, no greed, no corruption, no indifference.  Everyone is living in love, joy, peace, harmony, cooperation, co-existing with one another and with nature.

What kind of courage do we need to create to have that kind of day?

Posted by: clearspaces60 | June 1, 2016

Are You Recognizing Joy?

“They Have Seafood Crepes?”  The delight in her voice shifted the energy at our table.  Her husband rolled his eyes but his smile let us know he enjoyed her spontaneity.  I was the last of the four to order and had ordered the seafood crepes.  This woman’s question and subsequent changing of her lunch order transformed my recognition of Joy in an instant.

I had been contemplating what I truly wanted in my life for several months before this life altering lunch.  Looking around my life, I realized that I was missing Joy on a regular basis.  I decided to “work” on that by doing what needed to be done, making sure that everyone else in my family had what they needed first.  Volunteering at my son’s school and at our church.  Looking for a job and working nearly full-time trying to get our mortgage interest rate reduced through the never-ending loan modification process.  This had resulted in foreclosure paperwork being delivered to our home because the laws had not gone into effect to prevent the left hand from knowing what the right hand was doing at our bank. I was exhausted but I knew that once my ducks were in a row Joy would be just around the corner.

Then I had the opportunity to attend a week-long conference in San Diego, something I had not done since long before I was married and had a child and step-children.  The entire week had been a complete departure for me in more ways than one.  Having lunch with these three friends, who I now consider close dear friends, was a game changer.  This woman beamed Joy.  She did not work for it or earn it. There was no contemplating if she deserved it or was worthy of it.  Why was I working so hard to allow Joy into my life?  Why was I putting off experiencing it until a long list of requirements was met? How could finding out that seafood crepes were on the menu be my new definition of Joy?  She effortlessly created the moment.  That was it!  Joy was everywhere around me if I would only look for it and let it into my life.

Once I let it in, it was everywhere. When my awareness shifted so did everything else.  There was no waiting, learning, earning, worthiness or deserving required.  I became conscious of creating moments of Joy in bigger and smaller ways.  In a cup of coffee, a paid bill, a few minutes in prayer or meditation, my husband and I going to lunch or dinner without the kids, being with the kids and hearing them laugh, a moment alone in our home, reorganizing a junk drawer, planning a trip, talking to a friend on the phone uninterrupted, reading a book or taking the time to write.  Whenever I am frustrated or stuck and things appear chaotic and creating Joy feels futile, I remember my friend’s beaming face and ask myself, “What are my seafood crepes?”

P.S. I found this quote a few hours after I posted. I love this!!  “No matter what causes it, whenever a little bubble of joy appears in your invisible sea of consciousness, take hold of it, and keep expanding it.  Meditate on it and it will grow larger.” – Paramahansa Yogananda

Posted by: clearspaces60 | May 25, 2016

Go First

Raise your hand and Go First.  How does that feel? Uncomfortable. Jittery. Tense. Anxious. Panicky. Terrifying.  All of the Above.

I learned the magic of Go First in a college speech class.  I was a mature adult of 25 in a class of college age students.  Because I had a real job and some sales presentations under my belt, the professor asked me to go first in an extemporaneous assignment.  That meant that you stood up in front of the class, the professor picked a slip of paper out of a bowl and read the topic.  Then you had to speak about it for 2-3 minutes.  No wonder people are more afraid of public speaking than death!

I agreed to go first.  I have no memory of the topic or anything about the speech itself.  What I do remember vividly is the feeling as I returned to my seat.  I was done. My turn was over.  I could sit and enjoy the rest of the class and really listen to the other speeches.  All my life, I was not one to raise my hand or do anything to get attention.  I would remain in the middle of the pack, not draw any attention to myself and take my turn when told to do so. I was not one of those teacher’s pets or conceited students who had to let everyone know how smart they were.  And sometimes I  was the smartest kid in the class.  Talk about Clear Spaces, I was free and clear.  Free of fear, anxiety, trepidation. My literal presence in the class was changed from nervous student to fully engaged listener.

From that point on, when I had the opportunity to present something first, I did it.  No waving my hand to get the teacher’s or customer’s attention. I courageously and confidently raised my hand or spoke up. Whether I truly had courage or confidence in that moment did not matter, I projected both knowing I would be done sooner than later and would again feel that freedom.

Now the Go First principle is great but you may not always be selected.  In the event you have to go second or third, that’s okay but give the presenters before you your full attention.  One of my favorite experiences of being chosen to go second taught gave me a huge gift.  I was in a prosperity class at my church and we had to do a project.  Now in order to manifest prosperity you have to participate in the process.  You can’t just sit on your ass and wait for everything to come to you (sorry if I burst your bubble).

The minister told us to create or make something we had never done before. Oh Shit! I hope I said to myself, I am the least crafty person alive, what am I going to do?  For some crazy reason it occurred to me that building a model of a sports car would be my project.  After all, the parts were made, you glued them together, you painted them and then you had the perfect model of a little Porsche that would be manifested later in the full size model.  Having never done any type of model building or even seen it (I have three sisters), I was complying with the project guidelines and had no idea what I was doing.  Several hours after I opened the box and tried to get all those little pieces apart and attempting to follow the directions, I called a male friend for help.  Oh, have I mentioned that I was the ripe old age of 27 at this time and qualities like delegating and asking for assistance were not yet in my bailiwick.  My friend came over and took one look at the box and the parts and started laughing.  It seems that I had bought one of the most difficult models to put together.  Evidently, smaller isn’t easier in the model building world.

Well 8 or so weeks later, I had completed the engine block.  That’s right, I manifested the engine block! It was gorgeous, shiny silver and it fit in the palm of my hand.  I could not wait to present my project.  The final night of class came, the minister asked for volunteers to go first.  I raised my hand and so did one of my friends.  She was waving her arm like a crazy woman, begging the minister and me to go first. I had never seen her like this, she was MUCH more mature than me, in her late 30’s!  I couldn’t believe she was acting like this. I agreed since I knew I would give a thrilling presentation right after she was done.  She got up on the sanctuary stage empty-handed.  Where was her project? What had she done?  She proceeded to tell us that she had always wanted to have a baby but was unable to have children.  In the 8 or so weeks of this class she had-wait   for   it   -manifested a BABY!  All arrangements had been made for her to adopt a newborn baby boy.  We all cheered and applauded and cried.  What an incredible demonstration of her faith, focus and action.

Then, it was my turn.  I was thrilled for my friend and had no idea how to follow her.  I walked onto the stage and it appeared I was empty-handed.  I said how in the world do you follow someone who MANIFESTED A BABY in 8 weeks!  I don’t know exactly what I said but I made sure to let everyone know that I did not do my project on my own, that I had asked for and received help, a big lesson for me.  Then I opened my hand, extended my arm and showed off my little engine block.  I can still hear the laughter and the cheers.

Many people followed me that night.  My class partner made jewelry for the first time and at the end of her presentation she handed it all to me as a gift.  Her husband, who was a well-known actor, baked bread from scratch and had us all in tears as he shared the beauty of his journey.  One woman went into some kind of diatribe that I did not understand and the minister had to physically escort her from the stage.  Other people shared crafts and goodies and lessons learned. We showered each other love and support.  The class ended and we met that little baby boy a few weeks later.

I truly believe there is magic in volunteering to Go First.  And if that doesn’t work out then at least you were prepared to do so, you gathered your courage and confidence, and as always, your turn was always at the right time.

Posted by: clearspaces60 | May 18, 2016

Declutter Your Spiritual Practice

Wait, WHAT?  My last post came from an odd phrase in my journal with the Power or More, but now my Morning Pages revealed this wacky statement.  Deep breaths, questions flinging to and fro inside my head.  I held my pen like Jimmy Fallon writing a thank you note and waited for the music.  I need more information, what’s the rest of this message?  Silence. Not inside my head of course, but that inner voice, that calm clear intuition that comes in with commanding certainty, had gone offline.

This was a few weeks ago.  I write these three pages nearly every day and nothing along this line has returned.  I have been thinking about it a lot.  What does this mean?  I don’t “do” that much spiritual practice as it is, some meditation, prayer treatment work, a couple of daily readings, the Morning Pages. I don’t do all of this every single day but I have a pretty good track record.  And if you saw what I really need to declutter in my office area, dining room table and garage, you would be laughing just like I was instead of actually getting something done.

To the best of my recollection, I have never heard this phrase before.  It came through me as a complete instruction, “Declutter Your Spiritual Practice”.  I kept thinking and contemplating its meaning as a form of meditation.   Should I be doing less of something, more of something, something completely different?  Should I spend more time reading or more time meditating?  Pray more, read less?  Add something new, take out something I was doing??  None of this sounded like decluttering to me.

What to do?  I let it go, trusting I would get an answer at some point.  A few days ago, I did.

I happened to read Sheryl Sandberg’s commencement speech at UC Berkeley before the video was posted everywhere.  Reading her words had a huge impact on me and I had the opportunity to be firmly grounded in them before watching her speak with all of the emotion- hers, the audience and mine. https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/275924

Her journey in coping and living her life after the recent death of her husband led her to learn the seeds of resilience and how they are planted in the three P’s; personalization, pervasiveness and permanence.  But one thing she now does that she did not do before is to write down three moments of joy each night before she goes to bed.

She has taken gratitude, blessings and being present to a whole new level.  This was my answer.  I have been focusing on recognizing joy in my life for the past few years. It has led me to more beauty in my surroundings, peace of mind and personal fulfillment.  Her practice of writing down three moments of joy each night made me realize that my spiritual practice had become more of a “have to” then a “get to”.  I was getting through it at times, instead of being fully engaged in it.   My spiritual practice is not something I “have to” do before I start my day and hit my “To Do” list, it is an opportunity each day that I “get to” do.

The nuts and bolts of it don’t matter that much. We each have our spiritual practices or preferences and we can change them if they feel stale or boring or we need to shake up our routine.  But maybe from time to time we need to declutter the energy and expectation around all of it.  We can mindfully dive more deeply into the “get to.”

Posted by: clearspaces60 | March 31, 2016

The Power of MORE

The Power of MORE?  What in the world is that and why did my hand just write those words in my journal?  Morning Pages have become an entity unto themselves, I have learned to go with the flow of the ink, and the words that come out rarely startle me.  Sure there is the occasional Ah-ha moment or deep truth bubbled up to the surface.  I am familiar with the Power of And, the Power of One, the Power of Many, but this is a new one.

I let my pen continue the dialogue.  Focus on More of what you want, what you desire, what you yearn for, daydream about, MORE.  O..k..a..y… and especially direct your intention to everything involving finances, income, bills, loans, debt, bank accounts, investments, retirement, taxes, our business, our son’s upcoming college tuition and anything else related to money, your prosperity consciousness, feelings of lack, not enough, what you believe, what you fear.  Then focus on MORE of what you want.

Now I have been thinking/feeling/fearing a lot of this lately.  Yet even after decades of prosperity books, workshops, classes and being able to manifest what is needed, there is still this lurking anxiety and personal struggle with not doing anything to the level of “faith filled” excellence that I truly desire. And what does this have to do with Clear Spaces? For me, clearing a new space in my mind and my heart has given me room for MORE focus.

We easily want More for others; love, joy, peace, harmony, happiness, health, great relationships and money.  Yet when it comes to ourselves and I would add, especially women, we still believe we are not supposed to desire great wealth, financial riches, luxury or “blow your mind Oprah style” abundance!

If I tell you that I want more time to meditate or a more organized home or office, I would receive affirmative supportive comments.  But if I said that I wanted to live debt free with money to spare Suze Orman-style, I bet there is still a part of most of us that immediately tells you that you are greedy, selfish, conceited, thoughtless, ruthless and of course, who do you think you are to deserve anything like that!!  Get back in those little toddler sized britches and remember that money does not grow on trees and no one around here is made of money.

The truth is, even with our perceptions of the banking systems or the economy, there is more than enough money in this world to support everyone. We created this system with barter, stones and shells and we need to remember that.  Money is the means with which we transact business.  Keeping that in mind, I am trying out this focus on MORE and beyond money, I am including health, family, home and business.

What do you want MORE of?  What does it look like?  What does it feel like?  How does focusing on MORE feel?  A little uncomfortable.  I know that being comfortable with being uncomfortable is the only way to move through this, the only way to make lasting changes.

I will keep you posted on this journey as I still work with clearing, decluttering and creating Clear Spaces.  I hope you will join me.

Posted by: clearspaces60 | December 31, 2015

Releasing 2015 Revealing 2016

Let’s release 2015 by celebrating another orbit around the sun.

Let’s reveal 2016 by celebrating our planet and all of its abundance.

Let’s release 2015 with love, forgiveness, gratitude and compassion. The wise choices, the bad decisions, the kindness, the thoughtlessness, the fully engaged moments and those where we were indifferent.

Let’s reveal 2016 with love, forgiveness, gratitude and compassion. Eyes wide open, aware, available, with wisdom and action. Let’s remember that we are grace personified. Let’s remember that every other person is too. Let’s reveal truthfulness, honesty and kindness, especially in the midst of uncomfortable conversations or periods of growth.

Let’s release 2015 but not forget it. Wonderful memories, lessons learned, epiphanies and tragedies. Let’s bless both the babies born and the loved ones who have passed on.

Let’s reveal 2016 with peace and joy. Let’s reveal our best selves.

Happy New Year!

Posted by: clearspaces60 | December 3, 2015

CHANGE

I wrote this about six or seven years ago.  I read it to my beloved writers group every year whether they want to hear it or not!  Now it’s your turn 🙂

There is a vase on our dresser that is nearly full of change from my husband’s pockets or when my wallet is too full.  We use it once in a while for lunch money or when my son repays me for some item we have bought for him and he needs change from his dollar bills. We used to roll the coins and take them to the bank but that has become more difficult over time.  Now every so often we take the vase to one of those coin machines in the grocery stores to get cash and the service charge balance on a gift card.

Many years ago my husband and I were on our way to a Christmas Eve party and we stopped at a liquor store to buy some lottery tickets for his mom.  The store was next to a Laundromat and I was surprised to see quite a few people doing laundry on Christmas Eve.  This struck me as sad because these folks did not have access to a washer and dryer where they lived or maybe theirs had broken on the holiday.  I had a thought of giving these people quarters some day and parked that idea somewhere in the recesses of my brain.

This past Christmas Eve as my husband, my mom, our son and I got ready to go to a friend’s house, I remembered this idea I had many years ago.  I thought to myself, we are going to do this even if my husband and my mother think I’m nuts.  I enlisted my son’s help and we put $5 worth of quarters into seven Ziploc Bags.  This took about 15 minutes and barely made a dent in the amount of change in the vase.  I explained to my husband and mom what I wanted to do, so on the way to the party we stopped at the same Laundromat.  We all went inside and gave a bag of quarters to each person.  It turned out to be one family with seven people doing their laundry.  We wished them each Merry Christmas and they said thank you several times with questioning looks of surprise on their faces.

It was a great experience for us as well.  I was thrilled to have acted on an idea I had thought about many years ago.  Using a little change to make a big change felt wonderful.  It reminded me to act on my intuition sooner rather than later and not to worry about how crazy some intuitive thoughts can appear to be.  Change comes in everything we see, hear, do, own and create.  They say the only real constant in this Universe is change.  So perhaps if we want consistency and peace, we must wholeheartedly embrace Change on every level.

 

Posted by: clearspaces60 | November 2, 2015

“I Understand”

Two little words that should be stricken from the English language unless followed by a concrete fact; I understand you don’t agree with the rules around here, I understand math and will help you, I understand you won a Golden Globe for Best Costume Designer.

Yet in the most chaotic, heinous, tragic and shocking moments, people have the nerve to say “I understand”.  No, actually You Do Not, not a clue, not a nanoparticle of understanding.  My most recent experience with this idiotic statement stems from a confusing and insane situation with our medical insurance company and the doctor’s office, both were to blame and the scenario defies my ability to describe-my blood has boiled enough and I am putting my own health first in this moment.  Through numerous aggravating phone calls speaking to even more numerous customer service representatives, senior representatives, supervisors of the day-whatever the hell that is, and in one case an actual supervisor, I heard this statement more times than I could count.

At first I thought they really did understand and were going to correct the error but after five, then ten, then fifteen and then closing in on 20 different people, my own kindness and understanding transformed like the Hulk to anger, frustration and attack.  Numerous times I responded, No you do not understand, no one does or this problem would be fixed.  To which one young man replied, No, I mean I understand your frustration.  I said, I truly doubt that.  He said, I do, I had to talk to Sprint’s customer service the other day.  I replied, Are you kidding me?  Are you paying Sprint $1700 a month and getting nothing in return??? Then he was kind enough to say, Oh, I’m sorry.

And this is the tip of the iceberg, have you ever known someone who “understands” everything you have ever gone through?  They state with certainty, “I understand what you’re going through” and then compare some trivial incident in their life to a real tragedy in yours.  I work hard to never say this, instead I try to be truthful, “I am sorry this is happening to you”, “I don’t know what to say”, “I have no idea what you are going through, what can I do to help?” or “I cannot begin to imagine what you are experiencing, is there anything you need from me.”  In my opinion if you don’t have anything to offer in the way of support or comfort, or correcting the problem-especially if you caused it, then shut up.

Yeah I know, You Understand!

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